If you know me, you know that one of my best and worst qualities is that I’m a workaholic. I get a lot done in a day but it’s often at the expense of having a social life or taking a vacation. Being in a service based industry I rely on my clients to pay my bills and regardless of manifesting major abundance over the last several years, I still think that I can't stop taking the work. It never dawns on me until I realize how little I was able to see my parents when they visited for 3 weeks, how I’m booked in every day my husband has off, and how I am hardly available to attend the events of my community members. It’s really vulnerable for me to admit this to myself because I often get the response of “you’re probably too busy, I’ll just book with you next month” and my answer will always be “I’m never too busy for you”. I’m so honored that people reach out to me for facials and rarely will I ever say no because I genuinely love the work. So when my wonderful mother-in-law offered to assist my husband and me with a trip for our honeymoon last Christmas, I knew this was my opportunity to take an unapologetic vaca. However, as the last few weeks went by and we were slowly approaching the honeymoon of my dreams, I started to panic. That’s when I realized that Mercury was going into retrograde and if I know anything about this weird shift in the universe, it’s that it is an opportunity to test your faith in a higher power and my ability to handle anything with grace. So here it goes...
Almost a year ago I got married during a retrograde. It was terrifying for me to the point that I almost rescheduled the event. I am so careful about avoiding big life events, decisions, changes during these times of year because I know that oftentimes communication can be blocked or missed. But here I was about to marry the person of my dreams and considering rescheduling simply because Mercury does its weird dance? Two of my clients (I’m going to call you out Brittany and Taylor) were able to convince me that I should just go through with my original plans and trust in the commitment I was making. Thinking back, it was the ultimate trust fall into the universe’s arms and I am the most grateful for it. Leaping into the unknown with an open heart has shifted me into an almost entirely different person. I’m trusting, open, willing, and hopeful for the future. My Virgo tendencies are still trying to critique and control everything but I feel much more able to just let go and focus on what really matters in this life.
So now that I’m here, flying off to Mexico for a week of uninterrupted time with my husband where the wifi is non-existent, and I’m filled with absolute fear. I realize that this fear is actually my lack of trust that all of the work I have spent with my clients is going to fall through the cracks. The last thing I want is for any of you to feel like I’ve left you stranded but it dawned on me. 1) It’s just skin and not that serious and 2) the basis of my entire practice is teaching my clients to tap into their own intuition on how to care for themselves. That’s when the light bulb went off. I’m traveling during a retrograde for a multitude of reasons. The first being I need to physically be disconnected for my own sanity and the second, it’s my opportunity to have another trust fall. This time, it’s in you! I have to trust that you won’t just leave me as a client because I’m unavailable, that you won’t run to get a prescription if you get one breakout, and that you will resort back to our notes and hear my voice in your head repeating all the self-love I have taught you when treating your skin.
I genuinely don’t know what my inbox will look like when I come back but I can’t focus my energy on it. I have every right to enjoy my trip and know that my community wants to support me while I’m away. Thanks so much for all the support and I so look forward to sharing all of my new memories with you when I get back.